The Float
In which we seek words to describe the ineffable experience.
I want to give some space to consider one of my favorite parts of breathwork: what I call “the float.”
The breathwork technique I use to guide myself and others consists of two distinct phases. During the majority of the session, we breathe actively. “This is why it’s called breath-work” is a frequent instructional refrain. At this stage, we use rhythmic, driving, often intense music to keep our circular breathing moving – full breaths of air, through the mouth, into the belly, up to the chest, then released through the mouth. The music here can be dramatic and emotional, which helps amplify the feelings that come up. This breathing feels very embodied, and I make sounds – yelling, laughing, screaming – to release energy. I allow my body to move any way it wants: shaking, waving my limbs, and rolling around. (From the outside it probably looks like I’m having a seizure, but it feels awesome!) Many of the insights or “transmissions” I’ve written about came to me while I’m doing this active breathing.
After about 45 minutes, I stop everything and just lie still – much like the savasana, the “final rest” pose in yoga. I call this“the float.” Breathwork instructors differ in terms of how clearly they define this resting period. Some do not prescribe an exact time to stop the active breathing, but allow the breather to find their own way. For now, I like to be very clear about what I’m doing, so when it’s time to stop, I stop. I program my music to be more ethereal and ambient in this part, allowing my mind to enter fully into a different state of consciousness. It’s my time to float.
Feb 10, 2022: – The total unified being that is ALL, and feeling the glory of it. Warmth moving through my body. God as a sense of wavelengths, and vibrations, and rushes.Elsewhere, I’ve explored the challenge of writing about “ineffable” states – trying to give words to describe a state beyond words. Cannabreath, like other plant medicines, has given me glimpses into an experience beyond description. The more I can let go of everything, the more I can just “be” in this state. But if I want to share this, I have to try to find words. So, here’s a few:
September 21, 2022: Feeling like I’m the spirit - in energy or being that is behind(?) me in the body. Loving this body I am in. The sense of it being a home for me, but it’s really a machine/structure that will only last so long. But for right now, feeling so grateful and good about this body I’m in.The float can be a profoundly beautiful state. It can reconnect with me to some very profound experiences I’ve had with other powerful plant medicines.
Oct 26, 2022: ALLOWING source to move through me. Tingling, buzzing with life-force. Moving through my chakras. ALLOWING. And asking if it would come back with me and the voice of source said “I’m always here for you whenever you want to let me in.”The paradox here is that the more I allow myself to let go and really, truly float, the less I’m able to remember and share when I get back …
Dec 7, 2022: Floating/flying/really trip-traveling on the music. We laughed at the “scientist” who was pulling us back at the end. We let go of the planner/critic I think for moments at a time. We kept finding our way into music and then it was body, breath, soul, universe.There’s another potential trap. When attaining a euphoric, trancelike state becomes a goal, it’s the opposite of letting go. Now, we’re grasping for something. This practice is helping me see that letting go is its own art: letting go trying for results. Letting go of control. I can practice letting go with every exhale. And as one of my wonderful guides once offered to me, I can even “let go of letting go.”
And still: I want to at least try to articulate the experience to help others. I feel so lucy and grateful for being shown this profound DIY entheogenic practice, and I want to help others to explore these states. So while working on surrender and just-being, I’ll also still look for words and concepts, to share with others. For now, I offer these words above to share what I can about the float.
In the spirit of conversation. I invite you to share here, how might you describe the states that breathwork or cannabreath have taken you?